day420point5's Xanga

Friday, October 30, 2009

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 15:46:46 GMT

life is complicated like that i guess. you were my forever. and i had to walk away. i couldnt do it anymore. its just at what point do you say ok this is enough. that argument over nothing was it for me. and you say youve changed but youve been saying that since june. i miss everything good about the relationship...but the bad was just too much for me to deal with.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Thu, 24 Sep 2009 21:16:17 GMT

Post college.....

Basically you work for free and you do nothing exciting. Today I am at the sony lot watching the trailer and keeping an eye out waiting to see if cher walks by. So far no cher. Just three bottles of water a cup a strawberries and half a can of ssprite. The excitment of my day. Its hot. Perks of today..glass half full of you will:

Three free bottles of water
A cup of strawberries
A can of sprite
Giving kevin nealon direction...even if they were wrong.
Steak lunch
The possibility of seeing cher
Asking arsenio hall to move his car while writting this blog

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 18:23:07 GMT

This could be epic.

Let it be epic.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Tue, 18 Aug 2009 05:27:36 GMT

i just cant get past it. and if you have something to say to me....say it.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Mon, 17 Aug 2009 07:09:39 GMT

drunk...

I need time to think. Time to think. Time to think.

I can't do this and I wont. If its so bad then go.

I just need time. And I need to be without feeling guilt for whatever it is you need me to feel bad about.

When I get off of work I need chill time. Accept it or leave it.

Take me or leave me.

If its so bad just go.

I am always going to be ok.

Friday, August 07, 2009

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:28:36 GMT

Always so tired. Slept for almost 10 hours last night...why am i tired? maybe its the fact that im not sleeping all the way through. maybe im sleeping too much. maybe im fucking hungry cuz all i ate was chips dip and ice cream!!!

Friday, August 07, 2009

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 00:59:27 GMT

So as the semester quickly approaches...i realize that im not going back. for the first time in my life i dont have school come fall. things are wildly different and, if i choose to, i can start my life. And I was cleaning my room i started to realize that i have now been in SoCal for 2 1/2 years. I have spent about the same amount of time here as i did in redwood city. I think im 23 and in need of something big.

aaaaaaaand a big toast to the unknown. what i may or may not want.

23...

Monday, June 29, 2009

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 14:38:22 GMT

i need anwers to question that only you can answer. but i dont think i will get them.

still feeling like it didnt happen.

no anger. just confusion. a little rebound never hurt anyone.....right?

Monday, June 29, 2009

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 00:53:47 GMT

so i dont know what happened. well i know what happened because i saw it happen. but i dont what caused it or what happened. i would have married her. she was going to be my one and only. i never felt so sure about something. and it crumbled on me last night. i just didnt know what to do. and while my actions cant be justified, they can be explained and understood. how do you stop a top from spinning? i was scared. i was confussed. my heart was breaking but i didnt have time to think about that. it was horrible. and i just wish she would have stop. non f it could be taken back but it could have stopped. we could have worked through it. stuck on me touching her? what about her kicking me, pushing me, nearly tossing me down the stairs. guess that doesnt count. i loved her. i love her. but there is no taking it back. she can not take it back. i cant take things back. its over and im ready to start.

she ripped off her shirt......

Monday, June 29, 2009

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 00:21:57 GMT

another one bites the dust.

i thought she was the one. and i want to think she still would be. but if it came to this i guess she isnt. right?